I think I'm falling in love with a man other than my husband, Jon Bon Jovi. The new object of my affections and desires is Phil, the host of the Amazing Race. Of course, I would never leave my husband, JBJ, for he adores me too much and straying with another man would only cause him intolerable grief and heartache, but still, I can enjoy a little eye candy in the form of the gorgeous, sexy Phil once a week.
While my husband, Jon Bon Jovi, is out touring, earning millions to keep me happy, I can while away the hours with my fantasies of Phil. Of course, poor Phil is in a tremendous amount of pain, too, because although we are incredibly attracted to one another, I obviously cannot act on my feelings for him.
It is so difficult to juggle all my admirers without hurting any of them. My life is so difficult!
I was tempted to join Phil in this week's taping of the Amazing Race. He was filming in Sicily, so the setting would have been incredibly romantic.
But I was a good girl, instead. I stayed home and watched from the comfort and safety of my living room sofa. Although, you could see the sadness in Phil's eyes throughout the show. He was obviously lamenting being there alone and having nobody to share the romantic setting with.
Seriously, though. I have been enjoying the show. The hippies, BJ and Tyler, are the best. Ray and Yolanda seem cool. Barry and Fran, the old bags, seem incredibly irritating. The "Barbie and Ken" couple are sort of a boring non-presence. The two "frat boys" are idiots. I absolutely love it when Phil gives them looks of complete disdain when they show up on the mat at the end of the race. He clearly has no use for them and I love that he makes no attempt to hide that fact.
I have to give the "most annoying couple" award to Lake and Michelle. These two country bumpkin backway hicks are driving me freakin' nuts. If I had a remote control I'd turn the volume down everytime they came on the screen. The guy, Lake, is soooooo mean to his wife, regularly telling her to shut up and calling her useless. He is an asshole. I feel like taking the liberty of filing for a divorce for that woman. But the fact that she seems to enjoy it and spends her entire time trying to pacify him and apologizing to him for problems he caused is indicitave, perhaps, of just how and why this relationship works. I'd rather become an old cat lady than have to put up with that shit!
Below are Dave and Lori, the self proclaimed nerds. They were nice, too. Sadly, they lost this week, leaving us to deal with the frat boys and Lake and Michelle for at least one more episode. Damn!
3 comments:
I was all excited to see the Amazing Race at 8pm at work and then what .. people in distress calls! Go figure .. guess that's why I have job security!! This Wed again at 8 I'll cross my fingers nobody needs us then!
Yeah, that Phil is hot, hot, hot! You would love him even more if you had been watching a few seasons back. There was a couple that made Lake and Michelle look damn good. The guy, (Jonathan) was incredibly abusive to his wife, to the point that he even raised his hand to her, like he was going to hit her. Phil read Jon the riot act and told him to go apologize to his wife. Anyway, I'm sorry to inform you that the sad look in Phil's eyes this week was due to unrequited love for ME, Juanita J. Santchez. Sorry, sister, he's MINE!
I concur with your assessment of the teams 100%. Sad to see the nerds go...really wish it was hill-billy Lake.
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