Thursday, January 05, 2006

First "Lifting Session" Since Busted Neck!



I just worked out at home. I was going to go to the gym, but then I realized that I hadn't brought my sports bra to school with me in my gym bag. I decided I'd go to Target and pick one up, then hit the gym. I was going to make it a quick run in and out of Target (I know, who the hell am I kidding?) so that I could get to the gym on time for my 5:00 class.

Naturally I was sidelined in Target, but you would have been, too, if you were me. I am constantly bitching about the price of gym clothes. Forty dollars for yoga pants, thirty-five dollars for sports bras and decadantly priced tank tops are the norm in the world of fitness clothes. And forget the sneakers. You have to remortgage your home to afford decent, supportive athletic footwear.

Anyway, Target carries a pretty decent line of Champion sports clothes, and they actually carry these great sports bras that they sell for $16.99. I own many of them, but I have never paid more than $6 for a single one. I go immediately to the sportswear sales rack and find the ones that are marked down because of their hideous colors. Never you fear...I AM NOT working out at the gym with just my sports bra on. I keep things covered up. Jesus, I wouldn't even work out in the privacy of my own home in just my sports bra. I do not lie when I say that the VERY SAME bras by Champion sell for almost 40 dollars at City Sports in Cambridge.

Target may have cheap bras, but they certainly are not handing out the pants and tops for free. However, when I went in today, I was delighted to find that all the Champion gym clothes were on sale. I got a pair of fabulous blue yoga pants, normally $30, for just $18. I also bought a pink tank top.

Of course, after this shopping spree, I didn't have enough time to make it to the gym. So, I reasoned that I would work out at home to one of my cheesy workout videos.

I also decided that it would be a good idea to do some strength training to get back in shape following my busted neck spell. I kept the weights relatively light during shoulder work because sometimes I do get my neck all bunched up when I am lifting.

Jesus, though. I hadn't done this "The Firm" workout for a couple of weeks. I had been to the gym for my killer aerobics classes, but I had not done one of these tapes in a while. I've referred to the women in the tapes as makeup-covered stuck-up bitches before, but today they were really driving me nuts.

There they were, faces covered in 4 layers of Avon foundation and Frosted Pink Lipstick, smiling sweetly and telling me, in their smug little southern drawls, "Just four more leg presses. You're almost there." Damn Bitches! Of course they can smile while they're doing leg presses, but as they're smiling, I'm grimmacing in pain. Jesus, I'm hefting my entire freakin body weight up there with each of the 32 leg presses ON EACH LEG!

The strange thing is that even after only a week or two of not doing these tapes (and keep in mind, I have been walking and going to the gym in the interrim), I was freakin' suffering! My legs were turning to rubber even while I was still working out. My ass was feeling the thermal burn! I swear, my legs right now are still shaking. I feel like I'm walking around on two bowls of jelly!

Anyway, enough about that. Here I was thinking I was retraining my neck after a couple of weeks away from the weights. In the meanwhile, my arms and neck are gret (knock wood), but my legs and ass feel like somebody just beat the hell out of them with a sledgehammer for a solid two hours!!!

Christ!

3 comments:

Juanita said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
JoviFan said...

OK, I will do that. I am a civics teacher, and have a long-standing obsession with anything legal. I think I missed my calling when I did not go to law school.

Juanita said...

Oddly enough, I was shopping at Target last night for dance-wear for my daughter. Holy Guacamole! Can you say "pricey?" I didn't buy anything, I'm going to keep looking for something more affordable since she probably won't wear it anyway and I just spent $400 on recital costumes.