Sunday, January 01, 2006

"Reasonable" New Year's Resolutions






Lauren just brought up an excellent point in one of my earlier posts of today. I was going to reply to it as a "comment", but decided, instead, that the topic was relevant enough to merit a posting of its own.

I have long believed in this theory, myself. That is exactly why you will not see me resolving to lose 50 pounds by week's end (although I have decided to lay off the beer, between meal snacking, and any and all sweets for the next ten days as I have to see my doctor for my yearly physical and will surely have to hop aboard the scale...do you think I could get away with wearing a paper-tissue light sundress to this January 10th appointment?), or resolving to keep my apartment spic and span by running around with my mop and broom every single day and night.

No, I have long since given up on making those kinds of very ambitious resolutions. After all, resolutions are meant to be broken. They are inherently doomed right from the get-go. If Oprah has taught us anything in her 20 years of babbling, it is that we should take our goals, break them into little pieces, and make them easy to execute. Otherwise, we're setting ourselves up for failure.

(The other thing Oprah has taught us, in her 20 years of broadcasting, is how to rush out to the stores for the convenient Christmastime release of her "Oprah; the First 20 Years DVD set).

Anyway, Lauren, I point your attention to the fact that although my promise to publish a Bush-ism every day might seem like drudgery and hard work, the task is really quite simple. Recall the fact that I have a lovely desk calendar right in front of my computer that I basically have to peek at every day when I sit to work at my computer. The work is already done for me. I'm basically just transcribing the words of our "fearless leader" (of whom I am very fearful, indeed), from the calendar to you, my reading public.

As for my pledge to review the cinematic, modeling and musical "oeuvre" of Jovi, I didn't promise to take on this task on a daily basis, but rather by a weekly basis.

I think this is quite doable. Especially if you're on my side, acting as my critiquing muse. Hell, I can even give you my password so that you can sign in and be my "Jovi Guest Blogger." I understand that you have 2 kids clinging to you at home every minute, and that at your workplace, you have to at least pretend to be doing some kind of professional activity, and that these two things combined keep you from being a daily blogger yourself. But still, I've said it before and now I'm saying it publicly. If you want to get on my blog, I'll happily give you the password and you can be my guest anytime.

Now, for all of you who want to hear from Lauren, give a big 000h-ooooh!

6 comments:

Juanita said...

Bring it on, Lauren!!

Anonymous said...

Well, when it comes to Jovi, one can always find time. I have the latest album "Have A Nice Day" and I know every lyric from beginning to end. I sneak it on in the car between Elmo's greatest hits. I think my kids are so used to it though that they don't even raise an eyebrow when Bon Jovi is on in the car. My girls were introduced to the sweet serenades of JBJ while in utero, forget Baby Einstein.

Anonymous said...

Good thing I work. When else would I be able to goof off online??

Canoes under my shoes said...

Are you asking us to submit a five paragraph theme??? Ha ha!

Go Lauren!

JoviFan said...

Yes, I want five paragraph typed essays from all of you tomorrow, on my desk at 8:00 AM sharp! The subject of your essay should be, "The Marvelous Ass of Jovi."

Mo said...

I'll show you how to set up the trivia nonsense and you can have JBJ themed quizzes!!